Wake me up when May ends

I’ve always dreamt about having, you know, a catchy surname. Mine is not sexy at all, and it also contains my unfavourite consonant ever, the g.
But at least I’m not named after a stupid Spring month of the year.

What about yourself? Does your surname sound like Smith, Jones or Williams? (OK, I admit I have googled most common surnames in England)… let’s say that you’re called Richardson. Can you possibly imagine a month of the year being called Richardson, I mean… for the whole month?!
The people on the bus wondering: What day is today? Well, it’s the 17th Richardson 2017.
This would make a proper identity trauma & drama, and you’d be like: well, if this can really happen, then impossible is nothing.

Imagine.
It’s easy if you try.
Imagine that you thought you really were the legitimate Prime Minister, imagine that you really thought someone had genuinely voted for you, and that you were only a scarecrow placed there in order for the real bosses to take the time to work on a decent Brexit decision for the country not to lose face in front of the planet.
Imagine yourself making ridiculous statements to be dismissed by the Lords the day after.
Imagine if someone told you
That the easiest way for you to make an impact is not changing your surname, calling a general election or hiding behind a lemon tree.
It’s changing the calendar.

Theresa May caricature cartoon and UK flag

© The Shortlisted – 2019

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